I am GUILTY as charged!

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Colin Charles Millar was found guilty on two counts of breaking the first and second commandments during the months of April and May 2021.

Colin’s personal confession:
I confess that I had lost my first love for Jesus and had allowed the lure and adventure of the East African Awakening to consume my mind and heart even in my extended times of waiting on God.

I had made the ministry of the Lord a priority over the Lord of the ministry.

Secondly I confess that just today God revealed to me that again I had allowed the same lure of EAA meetings and zoom calls as an excuse keeping me from giving an unreserved YES to Christopher and Ashley to celebrate in giving them 5 nights away in Montana while we have the joy to look after our precious grandchildren Caleb and Ella.

This morning I asked forgiveness of my Son, and I gave him and my sweet Bride a YES commitment to putting ministry work behind my time with family in those 5 days.

I am currently in my 33rd journey through this 31-day adventure into the heart of God. My fellow South African, Andrew Murray’s book “Waiting on God,” is the instrument God is using in my and 1000s of other people’s lives, causing us to spend more time just being still in body, heart, and mind, and oh what a battle BEING STILL is!!

As I persevere slowly, steadily, quietly, patiently, often starting my day with our Father at 2 or 3 am, I am growing in my knowledge of Him in a deeply intimate and personal relationship.

You might be thinking: “I’ve known Colin is a little slow but 33 times through the same book!!”

The thing is, it’s not about the book; it’s about KNOWING God’s love for me, my family, and for you reading this right now that I am discovering the more time I spend with Him, the deeper I love God and love His people. So to numbers of you I have declared: “I don’t understand this, but God has given me such an overwhelming love for you.”

My heart response to this love is that I continuously hear God calling my name so personally and intimately as He reveals secret treasures of His love from hidden places in His Word. It seems like I’ve just begun to uncover this multi-faceted diamond, that is His love for me, which is the Light of the world refracted in magnificent iridescent colors.


God used three painful shoulder “crashes” to reveal that I was pridefully carrying the weight of the East African Awakening on my own shoulders.

God spoke clearly to my heart like this:

“My Son, the East African Awakening is not dependent upon you! I am the One doing the heart awakening of my people; I do not need you though I have given you the privilege to be involved. …….I felt His words very lovingly as He continued… listen to your Sweetheart you are NOT to go to Burundi next week; trust Me to use Evariste and his team to train the 1,000 leaders doing what you have just trained them to do, you might go on the next wave later this year.”

I encourage you, dear Saint, to take more time with our Lord every day.

“Go ahead, commit to Him now to increase your time with Jesus by 15 minutes every day.

— Colin Millar

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